Holding back in relationships has become second nature - there is always an invisible wall, behind which your soul is protected, untouchable. You never completely give yourself to the relationship. When it is over, there may be pain, but it is transient, survivable, not destructive. You turn to your protected core and your trusted friends and you recover, maybe darker inside, but still whole.
Friendship betrayal is the ultimate emotional darkness. If you hold back from a friendship, it is not a true friendship. You do not build walls and when the friendship fails, there is no protection. When relationship breaks, you reach to your friends to help you get through. When friends betray you, who do you turn to? You start ques
tioning any loyalty, any connection that you have ever had. There is nothing to believe in but yourself. Unfortunately, the friendship betrayal strikes at your core and leaves you broken without anyone to rely on, even yourself, unable to repair the emotional damage...
I do not trust anyone....